This jpg spoke to me last night. It reads, "forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know before you learned it."

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Or something like that.
One thing that I've been struggling with for the last weeks is that there are things I have so little interest in getting past the activation energy for, despite knowing that I'd enjoy myself were I to get there. I could, for example, have gone to a live band at CCB after hanging out at Flyingfeet last night.

( it got rambly. and i wish i could go back in time with a hat )

she finally showed up in a dream as herself rather than off camera someone something to manage ( Read more... )

If it weren't nearly 5 am (haven't been up this long but woke a while ago with some discomfort from I assume the antibiotics) I might write a year in review ( Read more... )

Well, the idea of getting up for sunrise made more sense before I somehow lost track of the last 3.5 hrs after getting out of the pool (I've at least located everything that needs located, and I suppose I could move laundry to the dryer now) but I think I'm still going to. Or I suppose I could set the alarm for 7:30 and just get in a morning walk ( Read more... )

maybe the chairs here at the library are the wrong size with the table. maybe i'm simply tired. i wasn't all that jazzed about the "brown bag discussion about using sex ed against rape culture" when I first got there, but I apparently made some useful points. One of which, actually, is something I need to write more about at some point other than ( Read more... )

People have been wonderful and I have barely been alone from the moment I learned Wednesday morning:*. Many folks came by lonebear's sun/mon. He even managed to put together a minyan Sunday night and we had a full evening service. Five guys I'd never met came to complete the minyan, needed for communal prayer. And I have very very much felt held ( Read more... )

I've not really had time to reply to anybody, nor to read. I need to make some calls and tell some more of momfriends, figure out when I'm going up to Mt Airy for final identification (possibly tomorrow late in the day, possibly monday morning), call the baltimore distant family, etc ( Read more... )

Dad doesn't understand why I don't feel comfortable driving 8 hrs to upstate New York next weekend to camp with a bunch of friends amidst spotty cel service. I suspect t-mobile doesn't work there at all, nor a good deal of the way there.

He does have a point that fragile is fragile and continues indefinitely. Otoh, it isn't that I'm not willing ( Read more... )

Things I could do without: being the person to notice (again) that mom is having trouble breathing, and being the one to eventually say fuck it and crank the o2 up. Sats now far better in ER but on cpap with lots of o2. I have my bag and iPad now; I think my wallet and laptop are back with my car at the facility. Had hoped to have an evening in ( Read more... )